Disgusted.

Sometimes I really wonder why such people are presence on earth.

Not to say they are a burden or nuisance but why do people do everything to get what they want?

Why can people act like they're good with you but yet on the other hand they can be doing things behind you?

Jealousy? Well perhaps they're jealous about something on you.

But these people somehow need to reflect on themselves.

Just two things that I tweeted yesterday and I really do mean it.

 

"People with disgusting personality will remain disgusting. If they aren't willing to change, fuck them away from your life."

 

"When a selfish person think for themselves and not others, do things to satisfy their wants, their personality is just ew."

 

Really just feel disgusted and bitch please  with your attitude towards people and things happening around you.



Can't wait for Thursday!

2 more days just 2 more days! The holidays are approaching but the exams will approach me first! :( Though this semester have quite a lot of in-course module but still, there's a lot more to do and memorise for the 2 modules that are being tested! GRHHH! Can't wait for thursday to come man. Had been looking at those review on the places that we will be heading to and it just got myself to anticipate more and more and more and.... more. Just hope it don't disappoint us. Can time just pass faster and allow thursday to reach soon?!?? Hope that my modules will pass and not let me fail and retake them next semester. I really dread that from happening and I really need to pull my GPA up. Sighhhh.

 

 2 days to holidays.

8 days to Shooting Club first FOC :D

Competition

Though it've been some time since competition is over, but still, here's the photos update for competition. Even though the results aren't what we are looking forward to but I guess we had worked hard for it and improved even more during this period of training. What's important is to be the ones who never give up and continue to work hard. If there's another competition with my lion head, just hope we'll have, I'm sure we can do better and approach our initial goal. Same as before, thanks to those who gave us chance, who helped us, who made us better, who encourage and discourage us, who taught us and those who are there for us. You guys did made us stronger.

The lion dancers of 2013

我只不过是个不被珍惜的人。

 

每个开心的笑容背后都有些不具名的伤痛和悲伤。心里的空虚感有时真的很希望别人能了解也能体会。有时为别人努力着，为别人忙着， 希望听到的是来自真心的：”谢谢你，辛苦了。“小小的一句话能带来多少的安慰，多少的快乐？小小的事情其实在心里却是最动人的。有时不管你怎么努力，不管你怎么讨好别人，让别人开心，他们心里还是没有你，在你心上的他们，你却不在他们心上。不懂如何讨好别人了，不懂如何让别人更喜欢，更珍惜我了。该来的总是会来的。时间过了就不再回来了。我只是个过路客，不再停留了。累了。

Hello Kitty Craze?!

Here there every where, now seems like the black hello kitty from Mac is getting a little out of hand. Selling at the price of 126000 currently like seriously?! It's like a bit over ah, but I really kind of find it ridiculous if someone go and queue just to sell it to others, then what about people who want to queue and really collect the Hello Kitty? Buying at the price of $4.90 but yet selling at such a high price it's really a OMFG seriously. But oh well, last night after training was feeling really very very low and was asked to follow them to get the kitty. Along the way things I don't want to happen did happen again and, oh fuck, don't like to fucking feel so weak though. Queued and waited for the kitty and we seen the ugly sides of some Singaporeans and of course some good sides of the Singaporeans. But we managed to get the last few Hello Kitties. I was there to just eat instead of really buying hello kitty, I didn't have any though too bad! Hahaha. Seeing them calling each other and travelling from place to place to see where have shorter queue for the kitties are quite a funny scene actually. But after all, mood didn't get better once I reached home though...

 

 

 

 

Somethings are still in my mind and still couldn't get over them. Just came to a point to realise and to see how reluctant and how ridiculous some people, some things, some issues, some situations can be though. People will still leave you standing alone, people will still leave you one fine day and it just depends on when the time will come. Guess it's time for me to just walk away from people who want me to be away, to people who find me an nuisance to them. Perhaps walking away will be a better choice to everyone perhaps.

 

Saying we're left to 6 trainings. Total we only have like less than 14 trainings in total? Tonight, I really do hope that tonight would be fine. Yesterday night was really too much to handle, the amount of failures and the amount of things that are deproving instead of improving is too high up, way too high up. Things will get better they say, how I hope it's true, and I hope to see it real soon...

本来很开心的。。。结果好失落，好难过。

Today in school was really fun, really funny, had lots and a bit too much laughter in school today. Linked everything to some things that shouldn't really match together.... Hmmm, don't release the things better. Hahaha. But overall, had a long and tiring but yet fun with laughter day in school. Thanks guys, you all really know how to make my days.

 

Today at training, at first I was looking forward to training, at first I was really hoping to see more improvements and more more more. Today standard was the worst ever standard we ever get, so much of errors and so much of what I don't want to see. When we are out of the lion, my heart really literately sunk. Have you ever encounter a feeling like this when you really feel disheartened and just really very very disappointed with the overall performance? Stress, coming to the word stress, together putting it with the word standard. Am I having too much high hopes that are impossible to achieve? Am I putting too much stress over my own shoulders? I really don't know what others think about it. But I think the target I set can be achieved within our range. There's just reason to why I set my standard so high, if we fall we won't fall that hard. And we work hard to achieve that result and what if we really manage to hit the results we want? I'm really really really very upset over all these. Looking through today's video at CC just now, do you know how it actually feels? Watching yourself not doing well and not improving however just deproving away when we are left with so little time and so little training? Do you know how it actually feels to be even disappoint yourself and make others worry? I don't know what I am looking forward to seeing anymore, I'm wanting to and looking forward to improvements and just waiting and trying hard to train for more and for the better. I really  don't know what else to say, sometimes words can never really express how I really felt. Just one word, disheartening. Guess I would still have to put up a strong front and still face the war, never give up they say. I hope my mind continue to tell me so too...

 

鼻子真的一直很酸，说说一下眼泪又打滚了。。。压力真的太大了吗？

Stress increasing yet not releasing.

It just came to the point where I really don't know where all my efforts gone to. My efforts aren't reflecting on lion dance. Similarly, it aren't reflecting on my results. A, a target I've set before coming into Poly, why does it seems so so so far away from me? Am I not working hard enough or am I having too much, way too much other commitments that I've eventually leave out on my studies? Time management, something that I manage to commit well when I'm in 'N' level or even 'O' level, yet now, I'm having nothing else but projects, school, reports, data sheets, and endless commitments, increasing commitments in lion dance. I really don't want to get bad results from anywhere, really anywhere. Not school and not lion dance. Results, I do hope to get good results, I wouldn't say that I've worked hard enough but similarly, I won't say I didnt put in enough efforts.

 

Lion dance, something that I've been working hard, something that I've been striving hard to achieve my best in it. Yet recently, there's nothing but problems and problems. We just have to overcome them again and again. Endlessly need to make things better. Some problems doesn't come from errors or what else but they comes from people. How much to get understanding, how much to not get tied down? It really comes to the point where I had enough, enough of increasing stress, endless stress increasing every single time, nothing is releasing but just increasing and increasing. No matter if it's from school or from lion dance, I really don't know how to manage or continue anymore at times. Well, being appreciative for people around me, those who are there to support, to give strength, to give what they can instead of just blaming and blaming. Those who are there, I know who, and you know who you are. Sometimes, motivation, supports and encouragement are really far more important than anything else.

 

Stress, I hope I can overcome you soon, I really need to. Stop increasing please, having stress is good but not to the extend of me having hard time coping and a hard time coping with so much stress at one go. I really don't hope to break down but yet it seems like breaking down seems so hard to even avoid. I'm trying hard to stay strong and trying hard, very hard to maintain my strong instead of breaking down. Tomorrow, final rehearsal somehow for it. Hope things goes well, really hope so... Our target, it still seems far away. Great improvements needed, more more more needed indeed.

 

Sometimes, letting go is a better choice perhaps.

Class Chalet #LEGGO ~

This year had class chalet with Poly mates again! Nobody get drunk this year, luckily ah! HAHAHA. Still had quite lots of fun this year though many of us get so tired and we slept through the night after 3am. Hahaha.  Last year at chalet there's something to worry about, competition. Well, this year similarly, the message was sent in the morning of the chalet when I'm already with the classmates. DAFUG, must this trend continue?! To make me worry about the same issue for both chalet?! Thanks them for being understanding at least they didn't blame me for walking away to talk on phone and some even bothered to ask. :) And of course, thanks my sis, Rona jie and my lion head for being there for me that day.

 

This 2 prepared a cake to surprise me for the night as a belated birthday celebration but hor.... I spoilt their plans la ah! I said:"I saw the cake already!" HAHAHA. Oops. Kana smashed cake by Emilyn, thanks ah thanks -.- But karma is always present just that it's either sooner or later. Ps you get it too soon. Hahaha~ We plan to go for midnight movie initially but in the end we went for scrolling around the beach at ECP instead. The haze made us see the "beach" indeed eh? LOL. Went to Ehub instead and back to chalet.  Overall, had a great chalet with them! School reopen soon, sigh, let's go~ Time to face the results though. SIAN LA SIA

Thanks you 2, for the cake and the celebration! Thanks for the card too Wei~

With the overnight peeps~

OTY 21st PARTYYYY

Today attended Ting Yan's 21st birthday celebration at The Warren function  room! Had much fun well, having props for photo taking is a good and fun thing to do though. Hahaha. I'm sexy and it's soooo hot! Though not all teen birds are there but still we did had lots of fun. This noon wanted to train but the haze level went up to 401 in the noon for the PSI 3 hours average. Tmd gan high can! My lion head decided not to train cos when we knew it hit 400 it's like -.- already. So in the end we did not train and yeah. Once we decided not to train, from like 3pm the PSI average start to drop drop drop and drop so much! But oh well, we can't chase back time and of course our health is much more important to us though. Haze, stop being a burden, you had enough attention, time for you to take your leave and let Singapore be back to the Singapore that we used to have. :) BYEEEE. SHOO SHOOO.

 

For now let's just let the pictures do the talking for a moment.. :)

With Ting Yan, Happy 21st Birthday! :)

 

Back to training tomorrow, I'm really really hoping that things goes well and also, to complete one full round with no mistakes and with good things coming along with it. Tomorrow let's work out our best for ourselves and those who are there for us.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

星期三快到了，我真的很担心。。。我不喜欢这种感觉，真的。

Haze gets BADder not better...

Yet another burden...

Yesterday night the PSI recorded a brand new record in Singapore. With a PSI level of 321 as of 11pm last night. It already reached the hazardous level and this is seriously bad for us, our health is an important issue. This morning the PSI is recorded 198 at 11am. Things are getting serious over here, it's time to take some actions if not nothing will go better yea...

 

 Morning when I looked out the window and see this serious haze, what strike my mind first? Tonight's training. Competition is really near the corner and yet I'm feeling unprepared. I know we can do it, I know all I need now is confidence, but the amount of confidence I'm having is just constantly dropping and dropping. Been through so many competitions as a music team, this is the 2nd time as the lion team with my lion head, this is the first, really the first time I've seen so many problems we can face in just one competition. Are we not fated to be going to competition this year? Why is it when you put in so much effort but yet things are getting bad, worst, more and more jialat? I won't deny this time we put in much much more effort than last year, how many days had we spend our time at cc during our holidays on our own and with our instructors and drummer? How many days had we spend training, spend on doing props and yet the props are failing from time to time and just increasing my stress? Maybe some people are just thinking I'm the one who's giving myself so much stress but do they know our target and our goal? Do they know what target had we set for ourselves? I need a chill pill and I really need one, I don't need a charcoal burning environment like as if I'm killing myself though. I need fresh air and chill pill, come on, grant my wish. For now, we're supposed to feel prepared, not like now.. So unprepared.

压力好大。。。

本来说好这个星期四要把需要的东西做出来，但今天去尝试，又失败了。
压力真的好大，这会影响我们，而且给我们蛮大的影响。。。
现在正在想新的方法，但就是想不出。。。
希望早有解决方法吧。。。

五月天诺亚方舟演唱会 （新加坡站）

Yesterday night was a blast! Went to Mayday concert, my birthday present from my sis which really thank her for this gift if not I wouldn't be there. We were very very near the standing platform and we were like nearer than some of the people who bought more expensive tickets than ours. Some songs which I don't know was really.... well you know, just sian already. Hahaha. But most of the songs luckily we do know them and we just get so carried away singing and highing. Hahaha. My lightstick spoilt and went to change it. LOL. Another highlight of their show is their controlled light sticks. Heard that for SHE concert there will be the colour changeable light sticks too! They controlled it and the whole stadium lightsticks colours will sync according to their songs. Just really did enjoy a lot yesterday! Next concert in October! SHE here we comeeeeeeee~ WE ARE ANTICIPATING YOU! xD

A day out.

Starting the post with a pose with Iron Man xD

 

Today today... Well might as well call it another lion dance training! 3rd day of training straight since Tuesday kick off. Had self training in the noon time but before that we went to Bangkit to eat KUAY CHAP! Ok thanks to instagram, made me have craving for Kuay Chap since yesterday. Awesome right! That's why today went to have Kuay Chap for lunch. Hahaha. CRAVING SATISFIED! This sentence is like super important here and right now.

Trained for an hour plus and quite a few rounds then we went off to play pool at Timah. Wanted to go SP to play but it's already 4+ when we hit to pool so decided to just go Timah instead of SP. Sian only the 3rd time playing pool so what do you think? Kana trashed la sia! But it's a close competition la ah! NOT TILL THAT VERY BAD LA SIA. Hahaha. Just played for an hour cos both of us need head home for dinner. Not shiok eh. Should play longer next time. 2 hours maybe?

Pool time~

Spent like almost half a day with this bro.

Back to cc at night for the other group training and also to try the prop. Idea secured but need to redo cos that one that we tried in the afternoon is too fragile already... x.x NEXT ONE PLEASE LET US SUCCEED OK? Raymond kor doing count down and competition is like drawing near already if we get the first day of competition, don't know when yet and also don't know anything until after we go for LUCKY DRAW. Well well, no matter what just praying hard that it won't be so fast and also we have enough time to reach the standard that we are aiming for. Pray hard doesn't work though, work hard is more important, right? #LEGGO #LEGGO

Credits: Facebook

其实我想问，怎么有时昨天说的话，昨天所答应的，今天都变了样？
是没错，日子一天一天的过，每天都有新的奇事，新的感触。
但有些重要的事怎么能说了就算了呢？

有些事情需要的是不只一个人的付出，不只一个人的努力。
当有时你觉得对你重要的事对别人看起来不是那么重要了，那种心情真的很沉重。
当时说的话都给忘了吗？答应的都给忘了吗？
担心的总是我，想要做的更好的总是我。
或许是我太重视，太在乎我所想要的。
如果有一天我不说也不在乎了，
那我真的失望彻底了。

期待，没什么好期待了。

Our first overseas competition for the young us.

Team Singapore, Team Stamford.

Yesterday was our first overseas competition for dragon dance for many of us, the young birds. It's somehow a really rare chance for us to get a chance to go overseas competition. But more to come I'm sure! :) Though we did not get more than 9 points for the overall but we did manage to maintain at our 5th position just like when we are in Singapore on our first dragon dance competition of us being the dragon dancer. It's the first time for us to be playing in total darkness. It's really that dark that we have to really open up our eyes and find where's the place we're supposed to jump. OVerall, we had done well! COME I CLAP FOR EVERYONE!! INCLUDING MUSIC TEAM! Had lots of fun on the way back from Muar to Singapore after our dinner. It've been long since we had so much fun and laughter for so long. Hahaha. Hope there's more chances to come, for botj dragon dance and lion dance!

Guess yesterday competition was the last time I'm going to compete dragon tail already. Well, honestly I feel rather... 舍不得 ? Yesterday I really felt that I didn't play the dragon tail well for the last part especially but watched video today and it seems rather alright! It's really a relief to see that. It isn't as bad as I though it is. A bigger challenge coming up next, get it a well done, accept the challenge.

With the peeps at Muar!

Next up, next challenge, next target. Lion Dance competition 2013 with my dear lion head! It's our 2nd time this year to get into competition together. This time let's do it better, far better than the past. I've told you my target and we together had set our target. Let's achieve it by training harder, be there stronger and better. Work hard to get what we want hard! Things don't come easy but we gotta just do it. You know why, I know why too. I know you will work hard with me. :) #LEGGO lion head! Tomorrow let the training begins!

With the bro and lion head~

希望今年我们拿的是更好的奖座。

19th Birthday~

Let me start off this post to those who first wished me, Gillam whatsapp me with a cute birthday song and birthday text when her phone turned 12 while mine haven't turn 12 yet. Hahaha. Allow me to use Chinese for the next part of the post then English will be back~

 

在12点正我收到oovoo打来的电话，接了看到台湾和新加坡的两个好友都上线为我唱生日歌。

真的好感动，好久好久没有大家一起出现了，而出现时竟然是在我生日想给我祝福。我还真的不知道是哪辈子修来的福气能认识你们，能被你们疼爱着~ 短短17天的相处，建立起了倒不了的友情，也让我真的感到很感动大家都珍惜我们的友情。爱你们，真的，谢谢你们！

当然也要谢谢安排的两位，Susan 还有 Rona, Susan 还特地飙车上山，危险啊。还一直不让我睡觉，我懂为什么了！辛苦了~

我很珍惜你们~ 新加坡和台湾的你们。

Went to River Safari today finally. Had birthday promotion and yea it really feels rather awkward to take out IC and like, hey I want the birthday promotion. x.x But really did enjoy myself at River Safari and Bird Park today though it gets rather boring at Bird Park without much changes. I would say, Zoo is still the best for me :) My preference la ah~ But I gotta really really be serious about saying this... THE PANDAS AND THE RED PANDAS ARE DAMN CUTEEE. I really feel like giving them a big big hug! The Pandas are so cute when they eat, they just totally look like they have a carefree life without much troubles when eating. The Red Pandas aren't that photogenic, in the sense of they don't really seems very cute in picture wise but when you see them in real, they are so gentle and cute, they stare into your eyes, give you an innocent look and melt you away, then they look away. Awhile later, they will do the same thing all over again. Ahhh, they're too cute already!

Also enjoyed the Manatees exhibits, they're really beautiful creatures, being gentle and just like a mermaid. Love it pretty much. The pool was also very well decorated and they have plenty of spaces more as compared to the space they had when they are in Zoo, just so adorable. We finished walking and taking photos in like less than 2 hours... Even including watching some of the feeding session in the park itself! Luckily we had park hopping passes if not I think we will be home quite early ah!

River Safari

As I mentioned, we had the park hopping pass, well to say is she have the pass to hop around and I need to go bird park and get another complimentary ticket. x.x I really feel rather shy to ask it though. Hahaha. It's really a long long long long time since I last stepped into Jurong Bird Park. However, it didn't change much though except for the Penguin exhibit and the new exhibits found in it. Was kind of surprised by it. Overall still had a rather great time in it, seeing eagles all over again, having to see the owls in the dark again too. Before leaving the park, the penguins outdoor really made my day, seeing them being so stress-free and just cute thinking we have food for them and swimming to us, then knowing that we don't and they started ignoring us. Hahaha, just how cute are they.

Jurong Bird Park

At night Rona jie, Ting Yan, Jun Jie, Kai Yun and of course my sis came over to my house and gave me a surprise. Well well, want surprise me on birthday aren't really easy you know?! Hahaha! In the end I surprised KaiYun, guess Ah Mui they all will know this very well huh, hmmm. Hahaha. :P BUT, they really surprised me big time with the Polaroid camera, something that I've always wanted for quite a long time and here it is with me. I don't know how to express my gratitude to those who shared the present, thank you all very much!  Think the joke of the day is me thinking today is a Sunday instead... -.- Thanks Rona jie for organizing these, greatly appreciated~ :)

My present from them and OMFG card which match my reaction to the gift well enough. xD

My first polaroid, to them who came :)

Thanks for the cake surprise too!

Lastly, happy 19th birthday to the 19 year old KunDa! Get ready for revolution and changes, remember what you promised, remember to do it. Jiayou bro, you can!

给19岁的坤达。

To my dearest brother:

The one who's always so near to me yet so far to me,

The one who's always there for me, yet made me feel so empty.

The one whom I depend on entirely, the one who made the decision in my life.

 

Hey, you're now a soon to be adult, you just turned 19, it's time to be a grown up. You've to learn to be more independent, never depend on your close friends too much, never to expect from them too much, never to want anything back from them too much. We've seen much and we've know much, accept the truth and move on. Leave what's in your teenage behind, those unwanted and ugly memories, let them stay in the history where they're supposed to be. Only bring forward the happiness and the knowledge you know to your soon-to-be adult hood. Guess you know me better than myself, remind me, guide me, bring me through to a better me, a happier me. Allow me to let go of what's not supposed to be, allow me to be who I am supposed to be. Be there for those who need you, those who really needs your attention and not seeking attention all the time. Remember those who are always there for you, appreciate those who are always there for you, nevertheless, be you, the good you that you are. Keep the little devil in you and let the big angel bring out the best for you.

 

I'm expecting nothing much for you, just these few points...

1. Be happy, be optimistic. Stop being such a negative person and stop dwelling of the past that's not supposed to follow you to the future.
2. Be healthy, get all the unwanted out of the body, sickness, illness, whatever else away.
3. No matter what you do, put in your 100% but don't let people use that as a chance to take advantage of you.
4. Do well for lion dance competition and dragon dance competition. Especially lion dance competition, the amount of effort you put in shouldn't be just gone to waste. Improvement and improvement and improvementssssss, learn more new things and learn more new things. Never give up, never stop learning.
5. Stop being a short-tempered person, be someone who's always smiling and being happy to others and keep all sorrows to yourself. That's what others are expecting from you too.
6. Slim down, the thing you've been trying hard and still persisting, time to buck up and put in far more effort than now.

19 years old me, Happy Birthday to you! May you be blessed with friends, with happiness, with blessings, with joy and with laughter. May you, be what you want to be soon. Have a wonderful 19th awaiting you to explore~ Enjoy!

Sem 1 MST down!

 Finally finally finally!! MST is down and a short break is here! Finally the end of the tedious week where I don't have much sleep and much rest. It's really tedious. But it's over... for now at least! SCREAMS! We are like a happy class when we completed the last paper today. All our faces and reactions are damn epic. Hahaha. Oh well, no matter what the results are, put them aside, when we have to come and face it, eventually we will. So let's just face this holidays happily first before facing the results of MST. Holidays, Let's Go!

 

After paper today the few of us went to Bugis to have lunch~ Ok fine, brunch instead. As it was like 10+am in the morning, yes yes yes, very early still while waiting for swensens to open, we expected it to open their shutters at 11am though. So went to lepak around and Emilyn bought us Twelve Cupcakes to share! Thanks! :) Though we were to full after our lunch and we just try to insert it into our stomach. Hahaha. Walked to Swensens at around 10.45am I guess? And the door is like already open! LOL! Had lunch deal in there. Enjoyed my chili fish pasta, as awesome as the previous time! :)

Twelve Cupcakes

Chilli Fish Pasta, Swensens Bugis

After eating went to karaoke with Rona jie and Ting Yan! Not bad eh I broke my record today! Getting sore-voice just 30 minutes since we started singing. LOL. Bad effect of not feeling well days before. Overall still had much fun walking around Bugis and shopping around after singing! This relaxing mood today I hope it will last, hope it won't become sian very quickly, I really hope so ah...

Lychee season is here!

 Received my annual birthday card from Stamford today. Yea through mailing! This year get the cow series again! Hahaha. But super cute ah this year one! 5 more days to my birthday but actually I don't know why just not in birthday mood at all and am quite reluctant to turn 19. Well, the year of 18 was good and not very good, I don't even know how to describe my year of 18. True enough that age is just a number and nothing much more important than that as long as your heart is good and clear. Well well, let's accept what's over and what's going to get over pretty soon and move on with life. 2 more papers to go on tomorrow and Friday! #Leggo!

 

The lychee season is here! Awesome! I typed durian season for I don't know what reason! LOL! But yeah my favorite seasonal food is here again! I don't really have a specific like or dislike of fruits, every fruits works well for me but I don't know why Lychee just somehow brings back memories and also is really a fruit we only get to see the raw ones at this seasons. Raw ones as in naturally sweet and yeah, raw. Shall enjoy the lychee season before it will be gone for another one year again! xD

1 down, 3 more to go!

YESSSSS! One paper finally down today! Awaiting for this week for so long, cos after MST week it will be a short break, a mini-holiday for from all of these things. Studying can get tiring too though, well this is the fact yea? All the modules this semester need to memorise, tomorrow is nutrition paper omg... I'm lucky to say today's paper turn out to be rather manageable! Was very worry for it cos went into exam hall feeling so so so not confidence in the paper. Tomorrow nutrition, hope the paper will be manageable too! It's just like F&N paper to be honest. Hahaha! It's a paper of whether you know it or you don't know it. That's where stress comes from I guess? It's totally bringing up F&N to another level with so much more information to take in and much more to memorise. Hoping for the best. No one wants to fail any of the modules. This semester is a good chance to pull my GPA up with a few in-course module and thus I have to really work hard to strive for it. Can't be a moron to pull my own GPA down. It'll be very dumb eh? Come on, let's work hard towards the goal! :)

笑。

我努力想笑，想好好抛开这一切当成什么事都没发生。但我做不到。当你看到自己被敷衍，慢慢距离默默被拉远，从以前的玩到至今的冷漠，看了心不寒才怪。为什么真心付出得不到别人的真心付出呢？曾经说过的话，曾经答应的事都走进历史成为往事。我不知道为什么，我那些好友都慢慢变成朋友，最后总觉得变成勉强说那几句话的朋友。别人怎么看我或许我不在乎，但你们，我在乎的人，怎么一次一次这样踩着我的落点走？也许对你们说这样很好玩，但我的感受，你们没想过吗？忍着泪水说这些话，要我说我不在乎我说不出口。看着别人越来越好，我就越来越疏远，当初呢？我努力在好友身旁却一一离开我。讨厌我就直说好不好？不要把我当stand by 或代替品。

From Instagram

I know exactly what it meant by sorry doesn't mean anything anymore. The top image came in time to my instagram timeline. What else could I say? It's my bad, my attitude. It's how I treat people that made people unhappy and kb. Wanting to change but somehow things just flow out from my mouth. If you treat it as I done things on purpose, perhaps I'm speechless towards these words. How unimportant I am now and how neglected I felt, these are things I may not say but yet I'm feeling them. Always giving out so much but getting back so less in return, why being taken for granted? Why being taken like you've never really exist or is never ever important? No one likes to be taken for granted from the people they've never been taken for granted of. That's nothing but the truth, perhaps the unwanted truth.

Happy 40th Birthday Stamford! :)

 It have been 13 years since I'm in Stamford. Spent 13 years of my life with it and it spent 13 years in my life accompanying me through up and downs, creating up and downs, giving me opportunity, allowing me to learn, allowing me to own leadership, allowing us to be independent for those who bothered to be independent. In here, a new family other than blood-related family is created. Been a century and still counting on till I'm not sure when as well. Overall, thanks for being part of my life and allowing things that never come true, some things others could never have the chance to experience, to all come into me. Dragon dance competition, lion dance competition and drums, these 3 strong main components, hope to strive for more improvements, more bomb-bastic performance and of course, to aim for our goal, work hard towards our goal and achieve our goal! Let's go and continue to make the history of ours! Stamford 40's in 26th May 2013.

Stamford's birthday cake :)

Some people who are important to me, I may be just a normal friend to some of them but I've been treating them like they are my bro and sis. Though I may be taken for granted, I may be an annoying one, I may be someone who annoying the hell out of people, some chooses not to leave. Thanks for staying, those who are leaving, I know, I can feel I can see. If you've tried to stay, thank you and perhaps, I'm sorry.

Had training in the morning today and yeah we celebrated Stamford's birthday after our 2 short rounds of training. Well don't know what's wrong with us, we only train 2 rounds today... Hmmm, can consider quite slack I would say, and we are just all very tired and shag. Normally it won't take us 2 rounds to reach this standard of tiredness, it'll be more rounds though. But oh well, am already feeling so dizzy after first round which I don't know why. -.- Maybe it's due to the weather I hope and not something else... Had a mini celebration as mentioned earlier! Sung birthday song and ate cake. Today cake like a nice eh! Rarely they produce such nice cake when I buy from them in the past. Not bad not bad! Hahaha! Sang birthday song like 4 times, 2 times fast and 2 times slow. The slow one we really sound like choir! LOL~

 

After which came back home and went to buy my sis wedding stuff for her Guo Da Li. The uncle in th shop was really kind of naggy cos he just kept repeating the same things over and over again. But had a blast of laughter in the shop too. Never know so much of Chinese customs till now! Interesting much I would say. :) After that went to my uncle house and finally tried SWEE CHOON custard buns! :D But taste like Kungfu Paradise one leh... Like the same. o.o Just that when cold already not so nice but the fillings and fun is totally like KFP one to me. x.x Still, it's nice ah! Hahaha.

Have my feelings been thought?

Been unhappy for the past few trainings seeing some people attitude towards training. Today unfortunately broke down. Who likes to show black face? Who like to be annoyed? Who like to break down and be unhappy? No one hates to be happy, everyone wants to feel joyful and feel the happiness that came from the deep side of your heart. When that feeling is strong, the happiness that you felt is pretty much the best feeling in life one can ever felt. The attitude, the words, how you've been treating others and taking training like a joke is really disappointing me. We are all trying to be serious, trying to find pick out the needle from where the mistakes are coming from. Yet you see someone just taking it like a joke and everything won't be his/her fault even if it is. Yes, people who have eyes can see and they  know what's going on. Pointing fingers around doesn't help. Why not try and think if the problem maybe on you instead of insisting on pointing your fingers on others?

 

In competition training these such of things happens and always happen. I know, yes I do. Guess on the day after competition, if we won or get our goal result, the people who will feel most accomplished or disappointed are the ones who put in the most amount of efforts and the ones who never give up on their team mates, never mock at them, those who encourages them and do well together, are the ones who will feel proud of the team who put in the same amount of effort, and be proud and honored of themselves and their team. TEAM, a important word indeed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Things changed, times changed, people changed. Where's the person I've trusted and yet again and again drifting away the distance from me? Why? I would like to know. If it's me who done anything wrong, let me know. Don't just drift distance away and left me there don't know what's going on. People words used to be trustable, people used to be trustworthy on their words. Things seems to have changed and not be in the way it used to be... No one likes to be taken advantage of or to be taken for granted. In life, unfortunately, there are people who likes to use people in these ways.

Yogurt, craving satisfied.

Today was supposed to be #TGIF, well it means Thanks God It's Friday~ But I said, supposed. Honestly, I didn't really enjoy my Friday today. Well well well, kinda glad that the weekends are here. So there shouldn't be much to complain about since I've got the weekend here with me. Today was a short day in school. Went to school for 2 lessons and then off to Bugis to collect my blazer, which will be worn on my sis wedding. Teehee~ I didn't expect it to be the way it is now but anyways, just accept it la uh. Hahaha. Lazy to wait and go to Bugis again and again. They helped me for so long I also feel bad la... Photo shall be up after my sister wedding. :) Ate our crepe, FINALLY for Winnie but 2nd time for me! Tried new flavor today but didn't really like it. Ordered seaweed chicken crepe but I got myself a crepe with all ingredients except seaweed.... Okay can~ Walked around Bugis Street and Junction, I swear my ankle were feeling damn pain, I don't know why though. Walk too much perhaps. -.-

 

Met Ting Yan on MRT platform after that and proceed to Orchard to buy my sis belated birthday present. Hohoho. Something wild and sexy on the 21st~ Hmmm, keep your thinking coming in. It's something HOT, with LEOPARD PRINTS. Ok enough of hints. FINALLY I get to eat my quite some time craving!! Yogurt~~ Are Blueberry Yogurt with fresh strawberries and marshmallows. Regretted ordering the small mini marshmallows though cos they are kind of stiff and not that kind of marshmallows I'm looking for. Overall the yogurt and toppings did satisfy my cravings. :) Yeah, it's Yami Yogurt in Orchard.

Yami Yogurt

Came back home to prepare training stuffs and performance rehearsal stuffs. Then poof to performance rehearsal. So much rashes on my legs right now. Yes from my ankle all the way to my thighs. -.- DAMN IT. Know what's the best? It's not even itchy, it got pain immediately. Trying to tolerate the pain which comes on and off during bath at different location. Annoying much. -.- Performing drums but we brought dragon music along to play during the journey. Awesome! Feel so shuang after playing the instruments. Hahaha. True enough, just whack! After the rehearsal we were all back to cc for dragon competition training. Well, don't want mention about today's training. Hope things go well tomorrow and for further trainings. That's all I'm looking forward for and hoping for.

While on the way to rehearsal venue

We are back, STRONGER.

2013, let's make it happen.
WE CAN, WE WILL, WE MUST.

Back to our first official training for this year competition. Last year was our virgin competition and we didn't do well for it I would say. With mistakes and a not so lion, lion, this year we are back and hope we can say bye to those stuffs, be back better, be back stronger! Firstly thought we lost the chance of going for competition, disappointment level was pretty high, alright I admit it was very high for me. But after all, we are getting the chance to be back for competition, of course we will strive hard and work hard towards our goal. People who know us would know, would see, we still train even when we are disappointed, we still train even when people pull us down. After all our efforts are not gone and not wasted. Really am aiming high this time, even higher than last year. Let's make it happen bro~ :)

 

Dragon dance competition in Malaysia, we are left with 24 days. Last few trainings, we must put up a good show! #Leggo~!

 

Today was quite a long day though on my time table was a short day though... Woke up at about 10+am and I woke up to a cooling weather with rain! Don't know how well more to be grateful for. These few days the big hot sorcing sun and the little or literately no win had been killing me. Been sweating like my sweat glands were tap which release water whenever and wherever. Flu was sooner or later. Having classrooms with aircon room, once we step out the room and walk a bit, the whole body start to feel the heat already -.- Yeah almost immediately. Annoying much. DAMN. Cooked my own Taiwan Maggie mee for lunch, finally tried a new flavor but it's not to my cup of tea though... :( Expected it to be nicer than what it taste like.

 

Went to driving and today driving was SUPER SMOOTH! *Screams* Finally I feel improvement and feel the satisfaction! REALLY FINALLY! Hahaha. Today is also the first time I drove back to BP, well cos he have things on after that.. -.- Took bus to school and reached school like 40 minutes earlier even before lesson starts? Meet up with the people and had my tea break. Was so hungry after driving... True enough, 4 hours was very long to take up and break down all my energy. Zzz. Burn my fats and use la! So much and so free of charge then don't want use. Dumb or what sia. After practical went down to Central with Winnie for job interview. Hope things go well and we get the phone call to start work... I hope la ah I hope!! Chance for me is quite low though... Pretty much cos I'm a guy. Well, hope and anticipate ba.

CAPtion please!

Finally we had a caps day in our class though it was quite fail~ Hahaha! But recently we meet earlier in school for breakfast and that was somehow quite successful...if the transport to school don't delay our meeting time. LOL! What a way to encourage us not to be late for class uh... Not bad not bad~ Wore my new cap to school on tuesday, yesterday lo! BOY on the top of the hat and GIRL under the duck mouth cap. Why scared why GIRL? It's kinda cool instead of just having one BOY word. I like unique and special stuffs~ Hehehe. These few days in school there are just a lot of datasheets, formal reports, OITP form, so many many things needed to be filled and also be done. MST round the corner, stress level increasing and studies are still in my pirority but procastination always takes place when I'm not supposed to... Why become like that, I would like to know too though... Sigh.

With Eileen and ZiWei

2 "boys" in class.

Guess what? After wearing cap, my hair become very very flat and smooth. I look damn kiddy and nerdy in that bloody hair style. Hahaha. And well.... That's how nerdy I look... x.x"

Week 3 of May~ Day 1 :(

Welcome to the month of May, day 1 of week 3. This morning get out of the bed feeling kinda awake like I've got enough sleep somehow. Once I got on the bus and got a seat my tiredness invade me right away. Wah amazing ah~ Hah! Upon reaching school, went to buy Mac Breakfast. Just reached school too early la sia~ Reach school 20 minutes before lesson. But after queuing and getting my food it's already like 7.55am. Walked to class like a tired zombieeee and enjoy my Mac Breakfast! :D

Mac SME meal~ :)

 Lessons went on as per normal today. I swear we are really having Monday blues! :( First lesson already gonna bored die us and somemore there's a test tomorrow! 10% of our overall results AGAIN! That is what's bad about in course module I guess... Every test counts more than those normal test we have from those normal modules. This semester we have quite a few in course module. Well, I like it though cos I guess it's easier to score for GPA with in-course modules. HOPE I WON'T FLUNK THIS SEMESTER! More than 3.0 PLEASE. I need it serious... Sighhhh. When lesson gets too bored, this is obviously what happens next! Hahaha, cam session! Hohoho~

With ZiWei~ :)

Today we had our BIA practical again and once again we see cute instruments that are used during the practical. Don't this look like those equipment used to make spices or chilli or whatever else you can think of? This is like the super mini version to grind and mix the chemicals. Hahaha! SHRINKKKKK. Indeed it's cute la uh~ Never see before so small size one. Hahaha. Obvious this won't be used to grind chilli or any food. It's too small to even do anything I guess. Even for our chemical, only 0.3g is used, not even a gram!

Letting go allow you to feel more relieved. So what if you've let go, you'll still dwell on the past and still be unable to fully let go of the past. You're left with memories that you once had and memories that makes you learnt to let go instead of to hold on. Things change while time change. People change while time change. Eventually, things won't be as what you've been through and seen in the past. What aren't meant sometimes will not be meant in the future as well after all...

Credits: Facebook